This is (not a story) about a friend of mine who helped me open up in a new and an intimidating environment. It is a story not about how he motivated me to speak up, or to be confident at what we discussed. No. It is a bit different set up. We both figured our own ways out to make ourselves feel at home when out to the world.
Trust is the best thing that anyone could have or could earn from someone. Being a confidant, could be different than being trustworthy. I mean, it could be different because a confidant can keep the secrecy of the discussion in the abyss of thoughts, but would you trust them in giving you a trustworthy feedback? I might be wrong here, absolutely wrong, but I think not. Not always. Being a confidant puts a veil on your eyes, which gets utterly and bitterly judgemental at times. (My thoughts only). So, according to me, this trust was earned by me when I asked about an opinion on a situation, and I trusted him with a truthful, and a blunt response, which I received ofcourse, but he became my confidant, when the discussion was not shared with anyone. A rare combination. But I found that to be in him and very few others around me. Very few in total, I guess. Trust also comes when the communication happens to and fro.
I remember that day, when I was going through an array of interesting topics, and an item caught my eye. It was very intriguing. I wanted to discuss with someone immediately. And that person happened to be him. I am not sure why, but I trusted him to give his opinion and I wanted to have a fair discussion. Many people would refrain from having a conversation on the topics which might not interest them, and to avoid any further discussion, they may nod in agreement. And there are few like me, who would just disagree on anything just because they can. And they feel they should. I hate to admit that I despise that attitude in me. I really dont like it. I really want to have a fair discussion. And this fair discussion takes place seamlessly with him.
We do have our points of disagreements. But, I would say, that I have started to learn to listen because of him.
At times he listens to me too.
Well, where was I? Ah yes, that line item. That line item was very peculiar to me and we went on and on over the discussion on that day and it helped me see that someone of that stature would be open to have a long discussion which still happens even after 3 years. Inspite of being busy he helped me see the logic.
Today, after so many years he is still one of my close friend. We fought lesser than we argued. Lol. But I would say that the first step paid off. He judges me all the time, and I let him. I dont know why? And I laugh when he does. He doesn’t speak much but he shares a lot about his side with me. I think I am not being a good confidant here. But so to speak, your annoying truths have supported me at times. THANK YOU, YOU ASS!! 😛🤗